October 31, 2014

Saying Goodbye

The grapes have checked out.
The zinnias are on their last lap.
The beans don't have a clue about what's coming...
But I do. And even though the light splashes over the leaves around me like they were lit from within, even though the reds and golds and tawny browns paper my world...I can't help feeling the loss of the "stay outside" season with somewhat of a dry, closed throat.

And I am not alone. This morning, the sign was crying.

10 comments:

  1. I think most of us have a favorite season and when it passes, there is a dulling of our world so I get this Julie. For me it is about what is happening now- autumn; how the air has a chill, how the leaves are turning and falling, how I want to cook heartier food and put on sweaters and heavy socks...this witching time that turns into the more reflective time of the year, is what beckons to me and enfolds me.

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    1. I normally feel the same way, Marti and your post really made me ask myself why I would not just feel glory-full, to coin a Gracism. It made me realize that there is definitely something else going on, some dynamics with my wayward daughter who lives on the edge of the abyss...the sense of impending doom is about her, not so much about the snow and ice and Polar Vortex'ing. So I went out and got some daffodil and grape hyacinth bulbs and will go outside soon and plant them with every intention of staying in the present. Thank you.

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  2. if only we could enjoy what is NOW and not pre-suffer from thinking of what lies ahead......if only....and yes, I get that you do, I do too

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    1. "Pre-suffer." Oh gosh, Saskia, you have just invented the best word the English language has to offer!

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    2. darn, I wish I'd invented a happier word.....hihi

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  3. i agree...Pre-Suffer...Wonder FULL way to say what it is...and that word impending. But
    i also understand, Julie. I was brought up to pre-suffer and it has taken a lifetime to
    teach self other ways of living. But then there are Real Things, that we cannot make
    go away, because they belong to someone we love.
    And for me, i am working to accept how i am about the very cold months...they are
    just hard for me. I don't "fight against them" anymore but i also don't love them and
    grieve some, the lessening of day light all the way to Solstice and i see that this year it is also a New Moon...just knowing that feels good.
    It's the season for lighting candles. I'll light one for you...for her. For the struggle.
    LOVE and LOVE,

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  4. sending hot steamy still summer evening vibes laden with the scent of Gardenia, the purple haze of Jacarandas in full flight and the warm tang of lemon scented eucayptus from the Land Down Under

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    1. I'll have what she's having, but hold the hot steam.

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